Blessed to drive in Hyderabad

Shakespeare said "Life is not a bed of roses". Indeed it is not. Coz, it keeps teaching you lessons. Even if you don't want to. And they are tough. Sometimes you just grumble, sometimes sweat and sometimes tremble. But that’s what makes you strong. You can take the life head on. After all, smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.

Though many complain, I am a staunch supporter of traffic sense of Hyderabad. And I hope it continues the same ever. After all, driving here makes you mentally strong. It prepares you for life. You got to be profound, philosophical and a visionary to draw the hidden gains. Here is an account of a related conversation (all cooked up) between a common man (henceforth referred as CM) and I.

CM: Do you realize how pathetic it is to drive here?
I: Why? What happened? Did you get caught by the stupid policeman for jumping signals?

CM: No Man. I don't jump them. But you see everyone else does.
I: So what? People are in a hurry. They have to rush to wherever they are going.

CM: Can't they start a little before, so that they don't have to rush?
I: Why would they? They all have only 24hrs in a day. They wish to spend the most of it with their loved ones. Why waste time in commuting. Haven't you heard of decaying family bonds because people don’t get time to spend at home?

CM: But jumping signals may lead to accidents. It can cause injuries or even death.
I: Silly Boy, I will reply you one by one. When you jump a signal that does not mean there will be pothole fronting you. If there was not one, there still will be none. Yeah, there might be other vehicles coming to you head on. So what, that’s where you learn to swing. You become a better maneuverer. Now comes accidents. There is always an insurance which is made mandatory by the government. You are paid for your losses. Those insurance guys don’t charge you an extra buck just because you drive in Hyderabad. Do they? See the benefit. And yeah the death. Well, I am a believer. Not an atheist like you. Life and death are in complete control of the Omnipotent. It's HIM who can give and take it whenever he wishes. Then why fear? Just because some people are frustrated with the way people drive, I don’t think Chitragupta / St. Peter is going to mend his excel sheet.

CM: What I am talking about is the bad habits prevalent here. Like people don’t wear helmets even if it is mandatory.
I: You are promoting some helmet manufacturing company or what? Why would one wear them if one has Rs.10/- bill with him? Why to lose on the pleasure of driving. You know when you drive without a helmet, the wind caresses your face, it blows through your hair and makes it unfurl. It makes you feel that you are flying. Flying high with no strings attached. Momentarily, it releases you from the mundane stupid things that people bother about all day. That's an incredible experience.

CM: Ok, then what about driving in opposite direction even if the road is one-way?
I: Boss, some stupid fellow put a divider just in the middle of a wide road. I would say that guy had a blurred vision. He converted a wide road into two narrow ones. On the top of it, you can take U-turns every 2kms. What if I have to go just 500 meters? If I am on the wrong side, I have to go 2Kms then take a U-turn and come back 1.5Kms. In Toto, it is 3.5Kms. Waste of fuel. Do you know India's purchase of oil constitutes a sizeable percentage in the fiscal deficit? Then, why bother about some senseless traffic rule. Why not think of the country's economy. If you observe minutely, that 20% who drive in the opposite direction thinking of country's fiscal deficit, have their chests inflated and head held high about their deed. They do it with conviction. I have noticed it.

CM: Oh I see. Then I am sure there would be some advantages of removing the rear-view mirrors from bikes.
I: Of course there are. You see, more than two third of the population here have removed them. And those who have not, have twisted them inwards. To make the two mirrors kiss each other. Of course that is for a reason. First of all why should one bother who is coming from behind. After all you drive your bike forward not backward. To see people ahead you don’t need a rear view mirror. Besides these mirrors are just distractions. They hinder in better maneuvering. Worst case, let’s say somebody is coming from behind with greater speed than you and he has to take a left turn from your right side. That is where you get to hone your reflex skills. By practicing your ears become so receptive that you know in advance that somebody is coming from behind even if you are in the middle of a vehicle rush. It takes your intuition to a higher level.


CM: So “Mr. Man of Erudition”, please tell me how do I get benefitted when any vehicle may it be a car or a bus coming towards me applies sudden break when it is only 3 feet away. My heart pounds.
I: You see, when your heart pounds, you get an adrenaline rush. Don’t you. Many people spend thousands of rupees going for adventure sports to get the same level of excitement. If you ride for an hour on the road, at no cost, you will come across such exhilarations at least five times. Suddenly you sweat, which burns the fat or should I say flab in you. Even if you feel that you could just have had a date with Yama, you still don’t pause. You move on. That’s what makes you strong, mentally tough. Those drivers are learned ones. They could have easily applied the break much before, but they don’t do it. It is for your sake, that they practice philanthropy.

CM: Thank you sir. I agree that driving on the roads of Hyderabad teaches you many lessons which are essential for life. Like racing (with others), saving time (by taking short-cuts), saving money (by violating one-way rules), taking risks, becoming mentally tough, adventurous and the most important of all, moving on unfazed even if you had a close shave with death. Thank you again sir for opening my eyes.
I: You are welcome.